It took me 40 years to realise, but the theme of my whole life has been about trying to make sense of two things:
meaning and masculinity.
I qualified as a chiropractor in 2004, the profession I’d chosen when I was 16.
It was good for a while, but after 14 years of working I felt unfulfilled. I wanted to use my creative side more, and have an income that didn’t depend completely on trading time for money.
So, in 2018 I sold my clinic and began making my own health products, first digital and then physical.
18 months of trial and error showed me that I didn’t have a clue how to market stuff online. And I still felt like something was missing. So I decided to learn, and it led to creating this site.
I’ve always been a philosophical person, and just selling stuff to make money doesn’t satisfy me.
I’ll always be a chiropractor, but that’s just one part of me. I’m also a creative, philosophical, indecisive, open-minded, neurotic, compassionate, big-picture-thinking, ‘spirit having a human experience’. I want to explore and to grow.
My parents divorced when I was 12, my father remarried and my mother got back with her ex-partner, a woman.
Dad was born into the military, mum is more yoga and crystals, and her partner was an executive for large corporations.
My mum did the best she could for me and my little sister, and we always felt loved. But growing up in a situation where the man of the house was a woman, there were times I felt frustrated and confused.
I was a sensitive boy with no idea how to be a man. And I’ve known anger, addiction and apathy.
I’ve stayed too long in the wrong relationship because, ironically, I was scared of hurting a girl. And ruined another by cheating, because I was desperate for validation.
Although I’d never do those things now, looking back at my younger self I can finally see why it happened. And move on.
Now I’m married to Lucy, an amazing woman I met ‘by chance’ on the train, and we have a beautiful baby daughter called Cadence.
Why am I doing this?
I set up this site to do three things:
- To share and articulate my own insights and experiences of how to succeed as a modern man
- To give me meaning by helping other people
- To create an online business that provides a good life for me and my family
I hope that being open about my own faults, failures and fuck ups, helps other men to see that they’re not alone.
That you don’t have to have it all figured out, or to be some ideal version of yourself.
Because what you do and who you are, right now, affects the world around you way more than you can possibly know.
Whether you think so or not, you matter.
And the more you realise that, the more fulfilling life is.
And that’s something worth pursuing.
I invite you to come with me,
I want to hear from you. So if you ever have any questions, feel free to leave them below.